This is Not My Birth Plan

Ever since I had a baby celebrating Christmas has taken on a new dimension of appreciation. I have been reflecting on the birth of Christ with new admiration for Mary. Before I had a baby I never gave much consideration that Jesus was born in a manager, that there was no room in the inn, but after having a baby I really feel for what Mary experienced. I'm sure Mary did not intend to give birth away from home. My own birth plan was fairly simple, a planned c-section today doesn't involve much mystery or suspense. (To read a great example of a birth plan, see my friend Elisa's very thoughtful and detailed birth plan for her son.) I'm sure that Mary had a birth plan, even if it was just knowing that a midwife, mother, cousins, aunts, etc. would be near. I'm sure her birth plan did not involve being days away from everyone she knows, and giving birth in a barn. At one level I can't help but wonder what was God thinking? I know that Jesus had to be born in Bethlehem to fulfill scripture, but did the messiah really have to come into the world to a mother who was in all likelihood scared, in pain, anxious, and hungry? Mary went through something that I can't imagine and certainly don't desire.

Now before you think that I'm completely irreverent, I do see beauty and majesty in the story of Jesus' birth. Mary and Joseph both obeyed the law of man and trusted God to take care of them. When they set off on their journey to participate in the census, they believed that God would provide, and in all honesty they probably assumed they would make it back before the baby came. But here's a mind-blowing realization, when they said goodbye to their friends and family, they would not return for years! They fled to Egypt from Bethlehem. Can you imagine saying goodbye to your daughter, heavy with child, thinking you'll see her soon but then not seeing her for years? But these were the risks. Trepidation must have always been a part of saying goodbye back then.

OK back to the beauty and majesty. The birth of Jesus is a reminder that God understands our humanity and our condition here on Earth. God promises to take care of his children and our job as his children is to trust that and keep moving. It doesn't mean that we will understand how He will provide, that's not our job. Our job is just to trust that he will. I'm sure Joseph meant for Mary to have the baby someplace nicer (cleaner) than a manger but God provided them with a space and met their needs. I believe that the shepherds when told of the birth, brought food and other necessities. I believe that the expensive gifts the wise men brought (gold, myrrh, and frankincense) helped provide for the care of the infant Jesus, and helped finance their stay in Egypt. God not only met their physical need right then, but provided for future needs.

I look at Joseph and Mary's actions and see them as a reminder to let go of control of the provision for my life. I am reminded to ask myself, "Do I trust God to provide for my physical needs as well as my spiritual ones? Do I really believe He will provide for my future needs as well?" I am reminded that I have to let go of my need to "know my future" and be OK with the answer, "I don't know, but I know God will provide." I need to keep in mind that my wisdom is just the foolishness of God, so provision doesn't always come dressed up and gift wrapped, but sometimes in form of encouragement from a friend, wisdom about a choice, or an unexpected windfall.

Sometimes a smelly old manger is the best place to be.

Counting

Cedric has been able to count to 10 for a while but I've been behind posting the video. In the video he skips 5, which I swore was because he had some kind of toddler grudge against the number. Zach is prompting him because Cedric is alternately video camera shy or only wants to look at what I've recorded, not actually continue doing whatever activity I'm trying to video. For instance, he's started singing the "ABCs" and its so cute, but I have to be very sneaky to catch it. So far, no luck.

Click here to watch the video of him counting.

These days when he counts to 10, its at the top of his lungs and after 10 he shouts "blastoff!" Here's hoping that "blastoff" won't be permanently wedged between 10 and 11.

Deer Poppers

My family has a Thanksgiving tradition of eating appetizers, sometimes we get fancy and call them hor d'oeuvres, around lunch time and then the Grand Fried Turkey Dinner at, well, dinner time. This year for an appetizer we were introduced to something so good we fought over and horded them. In my family, that's about as good a compliment as you can get. My sister's husband, Cedric's Uncle Jake, made us deer poppers from the tenderloin a deer he killed this year. Normally venison has a strong taste, generally too strong for me, but these were AMAZING, tender, full of flavor, and I knew when I heard about them, I was going to have to feature them on my blog. Please don't read this if you're hungry, you'll be drooling all over the key board.

To start: you need a tenderloin - Uncle Jake used deer but you could also use pork or beef - peperoncinis, cream cheese, bacon, and the special marinade.

Jake sliced the tenderloin into 2-inch rounds, and seeded the peperoncini's because us women folk don't like too much heat.

Then for each slice, he cut a hole in the middle and was very careful not to cut all the way through. You want a pocket for the cream cheese and peperoncini not a pipeline. I closely monitored the process, as you can tell.


Then he stuffs the hole with cream cheese.

Then he puts in a whole, de-seeded peperoncini.

Then he wrapped it in bacon, securing it with toothpicks. You got to love bacon. What other meat do you use to improve the quality of any dish? Jim Gaffigan does a great bit on bacon, you should watch it on YouTube the next time you're bored and need a good belly laugh.

These babies are ready for the grill!

While they cook on the grill, Jake would baste them in this marinade, its a combination of Italian dressing, dill pickle juice, Lea and Perrins, soy sauce, garlic, and a splash of A-1 sauce. The marinade keeps them moist and tender.

Seriously, don't these look amazing?! But I know this is what you're waiting for...

Look at that! Crisp bacon, oozing cream cheese, a perfectly cooked medium piece of meat; this is an appetizer that will have people begging for more and mercy all at the same time. Two of them was all I could handle.

Well done Uncle Jake! This is one nap that has been justly earned!

Nail Bitter

On days when I work my afternoon/evening routine is this: pick up Cedric from the development center, drive 20 minutes home, get home and feed Cedric a snack, make dinner, eat dinner as a family, and then clean up dinner. I get an adrenaline rush near the beginning that starts winding down while eating, and by the time the dishwasher is humming, I'm on the couch in a semi-state of vegetation.

During my "couch time", in which I'm usually accompanied by the husband, Cedric is left to entertain himself. His favorite means of doing so is to demonstrate for his parents his newly acquired gymnastic skills. This involves him climbing over the couch to stand on the end table, and then leaping back onto the couch cushions. It brings him such enjoyment and excitement. It makes me incredibly nervous! But as you can see in the video, he is somewhat cautious about it. I know that letting it continue is just setting myself up for an inevitable boo-boo, but I like tell myself that I'm allowing my little man to take appropriate risks.

Sore Throat and Freaky Flashback

Cedric with Uncle Jake

I have a terrible sore throat accompanied by a cough that makes people turn around looking for the old man, only to give a start of surprise when they see little ol' me. If you have home remedies, please post in the comment section. The only thing that makes my throat feel better is eating and drinking, so that's what I've been doing. I've probably gained 5 lbs thanks to this cold. Do you remember that annoying song Dora from Finding Nemo would sing, "Just keep swimming"? My version has been "Just keep eating. Just keep eating." Now that song is stuck in your head isn't it? You're welcome.

In other news Cedric is two! I know its not exactly breaking news, but it just dawned on me that now he is two, which means he will be three, which means I need to start looking at preschools. I needed to start looking at them yesterday. At least that's how I feel when I interact with other moms who have children in school. There is so much talk about programs, values, cirriculum, and how all these things help (or don't help) their kids reach their full potential. Whatever that is. Probably Harvard. I'm in way over my head folks. Deep down I want Cedric to go to a school that does help him reach his full potential. His dad says that preschool doesn't matter so much, where it counts is high school. He is probably right, but there are literally oodles of options and someone has to sort through them and pick one. Any volunteers? Joking. I volunteered for this just over 2 years ago.

Anyway, I was going through some old videos and came across this one of Cedric, this time last year. It took my breath away! My big boy, who says things to me like "I like bagels" and "Mommy, its a happy day for cake," could hardly even walk this time last year! It boggles the mind.